That's so gay is so yesterday

That's so gay is so yesterday

August 30 2012

 When I came out of the proverbial closet, no one seemed surprised.  When I asked why no one told me, the response was similar across the board, "you just had to figure it out yourself".  Makes sense doesn't it?  It does if your straight. I spent years denying who I was, pretending I was something I wasn't and hiding the shame I felt.  Every message I received as a young person growing up in a Christian environment was negative.  Every message I received growing up in school about homosexuals was negative.  No one taught me that happy gay families existed.  The worst thing you could call someone in the school yard was a fag or a dyke.  I watched Christian organisations persecute anyone who was gay.  I heard "love the sinner and not the sin" so many times that it makes my skin crawl to this day.  I tried to "fake it till you make it" and spent many years in an abusive relationship in order to hide my true self.  Internalised homophobia I understand.  I'm ashamed to admit that I would have been the first one on a "heterosexual pride" march. I spent more years on my knees in tears begging God to take away my natural desires, making promises I couldn't keep and feeling doubly guilty that not only did I lie to the creator but to myself as well.  I stood back and watched the persecution of gay individuals while fearing for my own safety, life and soul.  When I was diagnosed with MS I pondered if perhaps this was God's way of chastising me, if perhaps the promises that I couldn't keep now had a physical ramification.  My body had sinned, so it needed to be punished.  My soul was willing but my flesh was weak.  

It's taken a long time to come to terms with myself, to forgive myself and to re accept God's unconditional love for me.  The bible has a lot to say about our tongues and the power of life and death that it holds.  I looked to the words of Christ to see what he says about being gay, the simple fact is he didn't say anything.  Not one word is recorded in the New Testament regarding anyone being gay.  If it was really that important don't you think Jesus would have spoken personally about the matter?  There is precious little the bible actually says about being gay.  There are six passages that have been misconstrued to judge and condemn homosexuals.  None of them are words that Jesus spoke, yet still the vast majority of churches preach the "love the sinner hate the sin" line and spend hours on such a small portion of the bible.  

There are so many LGBT individuals that have taken their lives because of the words that people speak.  There is an epidemic of suicides all over the world of LGBT persons especially youth taking their own lives because they were created this way. It has to stop, and it has to start with YOU!