Gimpy New years!

 

I have to apologize for not updating sooner, so many things have happened in my life of late that I just didn't seem to have time. Writing is something that I enjoy doing, and I've been neglecting it and myself lately.

Right now my brain and my legs are not communicating. My left leg has been a little defiant for the last 10 years and acts up on occasion. When I say acting up, I mean the darn thing is acting like an errant child. I find myself wanting to holler at it, stand up straight, no not that way, follow along with me, come on pay attention! And just like a defiant child the screaming and complete melt down happens that you know is coming long before it happens, usually in the grocery store. NO get off the floor, don't do that, fine we are going home and you are grounded. My left hand is typically sketchy at the best time. It's been a long time since I dared carry anything hot in my left, ever since the scalding incident of 2005. I knew better, but coffee is so delicious that my left hand wanted to cuddle it too!

Don't panic folks. I know my body, it's limitations and what I can do with it. (Okay sometimes I'm not quite sure what it's doing, but I know what to do with it.)

Probably I should mention about now that I've had a girlfriend for the last 3 months. I kinda feel like a bad girlfriend right now for not mentioning it earlier. I'm very proud of her! Recently she has completed the required schooling to become a reverend. There is a holier than thou joke in there somewhere. At least she has blazed the trail for me. She has been amazingly supportive to me.

As usual my life a a combination of completely incredible events. I was speaking to a friend of late, and realized that if I didn't know me I wouldn't believe half of the the stuff that has happened in my life. Proof in point that the truth is stranger than fiction. I just don't have the imagination to create my life and all it foibles at this time. (I wish I were that talented)

I've been into creating art of late I've completed some exceedingly large embroidery projects of late (One took a year and a quarter and just about 800 hours). , and have been taking an active interest in painting. Basically anything creative and artsy I'm game.

Since my Sensei has just recently passed. I've been seriously considering taking a break from Karate. I am going to visit a dojo in BC where my Girlfriend has a friend who is blind trains. I'll still help out in the special needs classes, but my heart isn't into it right now. Perhaps I have to let my heart and body heal first. No I'm not giving up, just taking some time for me.

People have come and gone in the last year and I've had a tremendous amount of heart break, but with out shadow there can not be light. I used to spend time dwelling on it, but I've finally come to some conclusions that people who want to be in your life will make an effort to be there. I have stopped worrying about it, and when others do wrong to me I realize that my faith should not be stored up in man but in God, because man is fallible God is not.

I've also realized that my way of thinking is a lot different from most people this year which leads to my confusion with people. Luckily my Girlfriend thinks along the same lines I do. We were discussing this the other day and she was trying to figure out why people do the things that they do, what is the thinking pattern behind it. A complete dawn broke on the conversation when I told her, to understand them just imagine thinking and doing exactly the opposite of everything you believe and stand for. Suddenly it all made sense, really to the both of us. It's just difficult to keep that paradigm in mind when you are dealing with the masses.

This year I got to spend a lot of time with my friend and drank a lot of coffee around his kitchen table. We also toured around and fished, and then fished some more, and then when we were done fishing, we fished some more. His fishing gear was gifted to me when he passed. You can tell a lot about him by the gear in his boxes. Even though I knew he had gigantic hands, it was evident in his box which had scores of tweezers in it. He had a lot of patients, because there were a ton of home made lures in his gear. He was creative as there were very unique designs of lures. He was imaginative because there were lures made out of objects that were re-purposed. I kind of wonder how often his wife would look for a pair of earrings and wonder where they went..... I found them... a lot of them. It got me looking at things differently which you knew that he must have had a different way of looking at things with all the different objects in there. I found myself looking at objects and wondering what they would look like with a hook “swimming” in the water.

My schooling was coming along well, but stagnated. Perhaps while I am waiting for purpose and direction it might be wise to do some more.

It is a new year, and I'm sure will be filled with new opportunities. The consistent nagging of my life will continue, but I see a breath of air in my future and hope. It is a dangerous thing.