The Token Dyke

The Token Dyke

I don't drink. It's no secret. It's not that I haven't imbibed alcohol before, or even may have a glass of wine once and a blue moon. I don't really have anything against it personally. It's just not something I'm “into”. If getting drunk is your thing and you want to spend your money that way by all means do so. But for the love of all things holy do not approach me for sexual advances. I mean why shouldn't I find that fact that you have had to consume copious amounts of alcohol in order to make a pass at me? Why shouldn't I feel attractive that way? I mean who doesn't find the smell of alcohol on your breath as you slur words attractive? Oh wait.... me. There is nothing worse than being the token dyke at a predominantly straight environment where alcohol is involved. Why women think that because they sling their arm around me and say, “you know I'm not sure what I am, I’ve always been curious” that I would say to them, come on home with me. Thank you for considering me for your science experiment, but no thank you. I don't want to wake up beside you gnawing off your arm because you only wanted to try it and found out that yup I am a real girl underneath these clothes. Thank you for not considering my wants and feelings. Thank you for assuming that I find you attractive, my type and want to sleep with you. Thank you for assuming that drunkenness is some lesbian aphrodisiac. Just to be clear, I wouldn't date nor sleep with an actual lesbian who was hammered and wanted to drag me into bed. It's not something I desire in a partner and to make it clearer I just don't want to hop into bed with anyone. I value myself more than that and you should too..... and perhaps cut down on your alcohol intake.