Injury is always a great
impetus for change
I'd like to blame MS for the
entirety of my clumsiness, but that simply isn't the case. I've
always been a klutz and MS, well it has just amplified that for me.
Recently in my Karate class I was requested to work on my front
rolls. Usually I roll pretty well, but this day my brain decided
that I should break down every movement and try and control my body.
This doesn't work. My body and my mind are always in conflict with
each other, which is why Mushin (no mind in Japanese) is really
important to me. The desired result was a front roll that saved my
head from injury. The actual result of that varied. I ended up
doing a shoulder plant on my right side. My mind had decided to at
least save my face. Hey if all else fails I still have to look
pretty. My legs just kinda flopped down instead of having one tucked
like I should have in readiness to roll the other way. BUT I didn't
swear. It hurt a lot and ended up with me spending 6 hours in the
hospital getting X- Rays. If you are not a martial artist here is
the deal.... Doctors HATE martial arts injuries. Sure you can hurt
yourself running around chasing a ball and they don’t bat and eye,
tell them you got hurt practising martial arts and they look at you
like you just grew a third head. Shouldn’t I be able to magically
heal myself with my chi and why am I looking for sympathy when I’m
learning how to kill people? You could be a sniper in the military
trained for one shot one kill and you are aromatically a hero, learn
how to defend yourself and your loved ones and suddenly you are the
scum of the earth wasting the doctors valuable time. (No offence to
my friends in green you know I love you all!) When the doctor asked
me how I injured myself I explained that I fell, purposely skirting
the issue of what I was doing. He followed it up with, how did I end
up falling did I trip? I guess he wanted to ascertain if I had a
head injury or not so I clarified. “I was doing front rolls on a
padded mat and landed wrong.....in Karate class.” The doctor just
simply said “oh okay, let me check the x-rays” He was surprised
that with the amount of pain I was in that my collar bone/shoulder
was not broken. Just a sprain. He ordered me a sling and sent me on
my merry way with a prescription of pain killers and
anti-inflammatory drugs. Go figure no lollipop.
The next class I attended
I had my arm in a sling. The unfortunate part to this is that my
good arm was injured, so I was forced to throw techniques with my bad
arm. It turns out that this is a blessing because it is allowing me
to work on my weaker area's.
My life has been like
my injury, when something happens I am forced into using a skill set
that is weaker. Nothing changes in life until it absolutely has to.
There is always a straw that broke the camel's back. Change isn't a
bad thing, it makes you use things you never thought you could. It
also forces you into a sink or swim situation. You change because
you have to change. With all the changes to myself I have made in
the last year and all the struggles I have over come I felt the age
old need to get a tattoo to remind myself that I am stronger than I
ever give myself credit for. Unfortunately no cheap tattoo is a good
tattoo and I will just have to save up. This body may be broken at
times but it is mine and one of the ways I claim it from MS is
Tattoo's. My history is written across my body for my own sake.
That pain of getting a tattoo changes my present to past as soon as
the initial pain goes away. It is a cathartic experience and one I
am anxious to repeat as soon as possible.
Today I am awesome for
not swearing in the dojo!
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